SO ANYWAY. The appt with the doctor went well! For more details, please check out my OWN YOUTUBE VIDEO!!!! *shock and awe*
So now here's the UPDATE ON THAT!!! I started email conversing with the secretary at the doctor's office (superdy duper nice!! She used TWO exclamation points!) today to figure out when my next appointment would be. The first email I get says she scheduled for me January 26th and I'm all FUCK YES. THIS IS AS AWESOME AS MOTHERFUCKING CANDY ON SALE. BRING. IT. ON. But before I respond to that one, I get ANOTHER email telling me 'nevermind, he doesn't need to see you until March.' And proceeded to ask if I wanted to schedule that appointment. So I say "well blah blah blah spring break blah blah free any time blah blah dates" and then asked if she knew if I would get my prescription sent over here or if I'd get it in March. Because why the fuuuuck would they wait that long? I had not heard a medical reason (such as "Your bp is too high" or "You have to be able to do 30 pushups" or "You're dead.") so I was ON THE EDGE OF MY PHONE waiting for the next email.
DUN DUN DUN. YOU'LL GET IT IN MARCH. AT YOUR APPOINTMENT. IN MARCH. DURING YOUR SPRING BREAK. IN MARCH.
So I went home and watched AVATAR: THE LAST AIRBENDER and tried not to think about it. I did, of course, email her back before getting sucked into AVATAR: THE LAST AIRBENDER. I asked if there was anyway to get the prescription earlier, and told her that I could make the appointment in January (which was no problem to begin with). I waited and waaaaaaited while watching one my favorite shows of all time. I got on the bus to go to work. STILL NO EMAIL!!! Me at the time = OH WOE IS ME *fainting everywhere* But I was determined! I would either learn why I had to wait OR somehow get the Rx.
AND GUESS WHAT. THAT EMAIL FINALLY FUCKING CAME. And do you know what it said?
Of course you don't, I'm about to tell you.
It said that as long as I get 5 readings of my bp and the name and address of a nurse in Pullman that can give me the shot HE WILL WRITE THE PRESCRIPTION.
So now, I am on a quest. It is the quest for the Master of Shots, the one who can administer shots with such ease and accuracy that you'll wonder if you even just had a needle sticking out of your thigh.
I'm currently waiting to see how far between the bp readings have to be, because that will determine how long this will take. So a combination of win and disappointment. I'm just happy to have a way to somehow speed the process up.
IN OTHER NEWS. I have begin to work out more. Doing pushups here and there (trying to do 30 a day). That's pretty sweet cause I can already do more! Before I was all "Waaaaaah my fat is too much for my arms and I can't lift myseeeeeeeeeeeelf how would I ever survive if I had to hang on to the side of a cliff omegoooooooooooooood" and now I'm all "FUCK YEAH I CAN DO PUSHUPS" regardless of the fact that I'm still working with knee pushups of course haha ;)
It's been interesting the last week or so. I'm feeling really good and not in the "FUCK YEAH I'M AWESOME" kind of way (although definitely some of that) but more in the "I'm gonna get shit done and I'm sick of the way things are" kind of way. I've been heavy for a long time, and I've been ok with that for a while now. But recently when I realized I was unhappy with my body because it was female and NOT because I was heavy, something changed. It was kind of like this release of "Exactly, I've been ok with my weight for a while. And this just makes sooooooooooooo much more sense." It also made it easier to picture my "ideal" body image.
And with that, it was easier for me to see what I needed to do to get that body image. One of being fit and masculine. If I wanted to look that way I was gonna have to work on it before I even touched hormones. SO BOOM. PUSHUPS. TAE BO. WORKINGOUTLIFTINGWEIGHTSWALKINGDOINGEXERCISETHINGSWHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.
It's been about a week now since this happened, and it somehow keeps going.
I WANNA BE FIT MAN. AND IMMA MOTHERFUCKIN' DO IT.
What is something that YOU want to do? And what's stopping you? Is there a different angle you can look at it?
GOODNIGHT
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